Chesterfieldian Recounts Her Hidden Child Holocaust Survivor Story

This week, Patch introduces you to Chesterfield resident Rachel Goldman Miller, a hidden child Holocaust survivor whose story will be told in a multimedia stage presentation at the Jewish Community Center in August.

Paris, 1942. Amid increasing rumors of Nazi actions against Jews, a mother sent her 9-year-old daughter into hiding at a summer camp outside of Paris. Rachel Goldman Miller never saw her family again—they were taken by the Germans three days later. 

It wouldn't be the end of challenges faced by Miller, including several near brushes with capture, years of living in foster homes, the death of her son by AIDS and her battle with breast cancer.

Now Miller's life has become the subject of a multimedia stage show, Beyond Me: A Song Cycle in the Key of Survival, which will be presented at 4 p.m. Aug. 21 at the  in Creve Coeur. Miller speaks regularly with students at the St. Louis Holocaust Museum and Learning Center.

“I tell my story,” Miller said. “It keeps my family alive.”

Miller enjoyed a happy childhood in Paris, the city her father had fled to in order to escape the Nazis invading Poland. When the Germans invaded and annexed parts of France, things began to change.

Miller had to wear a yellow star which read "Juif"—French for "Jew." Eventually, the Schutzstaffel carted off her father and uncle to Drancy internment camp. They both died in the hospital in December 1941. “We thought they died of natural causes,” Miller said. “We found out later they were injected with gas.”

After the death of her father, Miller's brother Adolphe began fighting with the French Resistance as the situation for Jews continued to deteriorate. “Everyone knew something was going on,” Miller said. “There were rumors, but at that time we didn't know families were being taken.”

In July 1942, Miller's mother sent her to live on a farm that was run as a summer camp for kids, warning her not to tell the other kids she was Jewish. Only the farm's owners would know. Her sister Sabine would follow in a few days.

“When my mother told me to lie about by name, I was shocked,” Miller said. “We were not to lie. My name became Christine.”

As a 9-year-old, Miller didn't understand what was going on. “I was very angry with my mother,” she said. “Why did she lie to me? Of course she saved my life, but children don't think that way. My sister Sabine was supposed to join us, but she never came. They were taken three days later. I never saw her or my parents again.”

Miller's next near brush came when a reward of 300 Francs was offered for turning in Jews. The woman who owned the farm wrote to Miller's aunt, Rose, asking permission to turn the little girl in for the reward. “My aunt wrote her back and said, 'Please don't do that,' and sent her the 300 Francs,” Miller said. “That again saved my life.”

During that summer, France was cooperating with the Germans, and French nationals were no longer being taken. Miller returned to Paris to live with her aunt. She visited her family home on the day German soldiers and French police were looting the apartment. 

“I asked the soldiers to let me go up and get the family pictures, and they let me,” Miller said. “I was terrified, but I wanted to have the pictures. I just did it. Can you imagine? A 9-year-old girl asking the soldiers to let her go in? I'm one of the few Holocaust survivors to have family photos.”

She lived with her aunt for a time in constant fear. Miller said she couldn't make friends because of fear and not knowing if they would be there tomorrow. There were also frequent raids.

“We hid in the basement once for five days,” Miller said. “To this day, I'm afraid of rodents. I'm wary of dogs because the Germans used dogs. I saw women throwing themselves out of windows.”

Eventually, Miller wound up in an orphanage until an American soldier rescued her and brought her to the U.S. She lived in a series of five foster homes until she married her husband in 1950.

She moved to St. Louis to be near her son, Neil. Her other son, Mark, died of AIDS. “That was like a second Holocaust to me,” Miller said. “That still pains me.” Miller also survived a battle with breast cancer. 

Miller found the courage to visit Auschwitz concentration camp where her family—including her mother, Helen; her sister, Sabine; and her brothers, Henry and Adolphe—died. She still feels outrage at what transpired there.

"Do you know what they did at Auschwitz?” Miller said. “They would have a Jewish orchestra play classical music as people entered the gas chamber. They called it a spa. You can see the fingernail imprints in the wall from people trying to catch their last breath. I lost 93 people.”

As Miller looks back on her life, she remains philosophical. “For many years I felt guilty,” she said. “Why was I the one to survive? I think it's because I tell my story.”

The show based on Miller's life, Beyond Me: A Song Cycle in the Key of Survival, will be performed at 4 p.m. Aug. 21 at the JCC. For tickets visit Brown Paper Tickets, or call 314-442-3711. Tickets cost $18 to $36.